The Greatest Gift

Dear  Sister, 

Welcome to what is often called the most wonderful time of the year: the holiday season that seems to consume the month of December and beyond. It’s a huge gift-giving time of year when we focus on family gatherings and a shopping list: what to get nieces and nephews, best friends, spouses and kids, and coworkers.

It’s also a time when it’s easy to become overwhelmed with small details, such as how many cookies you need to bake for your child’s school holiday party, what to wear to the company holiday event, when you’ll have time to shop on the weekend, what to make for the family holiday dinner, and can your budget possibly stretch to meet these and other expectations of the holiday season.

All of these demands, plus those you impose upon yourself when you cling to old habits and traditions that no longer fit into your life, can result in feeling sheer panic. That’s when you may hear a voice in your head: “you’re not good enough, you’re not doing enough, you’re a failure, you need to buy more stuff, you need to, must, should” (fill in the blank). 

I implore you to stop, shut off the voice, take a few deep breaths, and reflect on what is really important this holiday season. 

More specifically,

It’s much too easy to divert our attention from the spirit of the season and to focus on material things. After all, we are constantly bombarded with advertisements, commercials, and pressure from other sources to buy more, want more, spend more, and be more, even though none of these demands have been linked to personal happiness, satisfaction, or joy. 

When we talk about love during the holidays, it’s important that we target the most important love of all: self-love.

Yes, I know you may be saying that sounds selfish, self-centered, or egotistical, but the truth is, you need to love yourself before you can fully love others. You have likely heard this sage wisdom many times, but that doesn’t make it any less relevant or true. What is necessary is for you to embrace it, believe it, and then live it. When you care for yourself, the energy you embody will be jettisoned out into the world, experienced and witnessed by others. It is the greatest gift you can give to yourself and others. 

Cultivating self-love and connection with the Divine Feminine is a life-long journey—and adventure!--and so the best time to begin is now! How can you work on achieving self-love during these challenging times? Here are a few suggestions that are relevant not only now but all year-round.

Practice these suggestions every day—as many as you can as often as you can. Congratulate yourself every time you take a positive step. However, don’t be hard on yourself if you find it challenging to practice these self-love acts. You have what it takes to keep moving forward.

My sincere wish is that these self-love acts or thoughts become a habit, so that you can truly enjoy and embrace the joys of life and experience the wonder that you deserve.


11 self-love actions


Be your own best friend. When a challenging situation arises, think about how you would talk to a best friend who was experiencing the same thing. That’s how you want to treat yourself and talk to yourself.

Engage in physical activity. Whether it is sedate or vigorous, sprinting or walking, move your body and celebrate the energy that surges through you as you do.

Act like a child: not childish but childlike. Take the time to look at some aspect of nature as if you have seen it for the very first time. Be playful and don’t take your life so seriously.

Seek the Divine Feminine. She already resides within you; it’s simply up to you to make the connection. Take some private time daily to meditate, focus on connecting with the Divine Feminine within, and speaking your mind, even if silently. Be patient; you will connect. 

Banish the negatives. The words you speak to and about yourself are incredibly powerful, even if you don’t realize it. Every time you utter something negative about yourself, take a moment to turn it around to a positive statement.

Nourish your essence. Eating food that is processed and refined introduces toxins into your body, mind, and spirit. Whole, natural foods nourish you holistically, gut to brain to spirit self and should always be your choice.

Express yourself. Jot down your desires, fears, goals, dreams, and challenges. Seeing your feelings in black and white can help you ask important questions: Why do each of these things matter to me? What do I need to do to make them a reality? How important is this to me right now?

Express gratitude. It’s a scientific fact: expressing gratitude is healthy physically, psychologically, and spiritually. It also boosts your self-esteem. Every day, express at least three things for which you are grateful. 

Get enough sleep. It’s easy to let yourself get rundown and overly tired by trying to do too much and/or worrying all night about what you need to do. Practice healthful bedtime habits every night, including going to bed and getting up at the same time every day.

Practice meditation. Engaging in meditation daily is a powerful yet quiet way to destress and show yourself self-love. Ten to 20 minutes of meditation daily can help you connect with your Divine Feminine, release your anxiety and stress, and prepare to focus on your day.

Create boundaries. “No” is such a small work yet it carries incredible power when it is used correctly. Saying “no” is a way to create boundaries, and oftentimes during the holiday season, uttering this simple word can relieve you of enormous stress and give you enormous ease. When you are getting stretched beyond your limits, say “no.” 

Wishing all of my sisters a healthy, joyous, powerful, and spiritually rich holiday season.  

Myriam Llano